Sea jokes

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Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump and Angela Merkel are standing at the shore and are trying to impress each other with the accomplishments of their countries. Putin brags „We have nuclear submarines which can stay under water for six weeks without having to resurface!“. Trump goes on „Six weeks? That’s nothing. I have the best submarines, they‘re underwater fur at least three months!“. Merkel is about to respond, when a giant steel colossus emerges from the sea. A hatch opens, a black uniform appears - „Heil Hitler! We need Diesel.“ How does the sea say hello It WAVES you SEA what I did their I’m SHORE you saw it Don’t be SALTY

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why was the sand wet? because the sea weed!

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I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very EGGxiting, all though, I was EGGxaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then your hard boiled, that’s all for today YOLKS, so I said before several cats starting fighting, that sht was a CATastrophe, these kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be KITTEN me.” Mean while, in the ocean, they just waved, SEA what I did there? You SHORE you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too DEEP for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had NO BODY. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He BNED her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.

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Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over a bay, they would be bagels.

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Why can’t blind people eat fish? Because it’s sea food.

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have you seen the xbox game sea of thieves?sea if these nuts fit on yo mouth

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What is the weirdest thing to wear and what is weirdest thing to say. Weirdest thing to ware: Socks with sandals, also with flip flops! Weirdest thing to say: “Would you rather be a bath or a toilet?” “The blue angel sea slug looks like an alien.” (weird). Bonus: Things to ware with other things: Crop top with t-shirt(really hip), Crop top with tights or shorts, dresses with tights! (Cool) Oh well byeeeeeee! All these sea monster jokes are just Kraken me up.

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